Tuesday, February 10, 2009

How to lose readers and alienate your blog



Hey Kids! Sorry I haven’t been around much. I have been totally slammed at work these days, and if that wasn’t enough, the wife and I decided to remodel our kitchen. But I’ll have more about that later. I decided to check good ‘ol Google Analytics to see how many of my readers have gotten tired of checking back for updates and have left for good. I gotta say I was pleasantly surprised to find that I still have a total of eight faithful readers. However, Google states it in a much more depressing “99.06% loss of readership” way. So anyways, while I was there I decided to check out the latest searches that have brought strangers to this blog. Again, I have some entertaining ones to share.

Palestine Retards – I don’t specifically remember referring to any Middle Eastern school of MR/DD, but apparently I must have.

Squeak Makeup – I don’t know what to say about this. Those two words don’t belong in the same term together.

Black Pusses – The sad thing is, this person was probably looking for a particular type of porn, and accidentally misspelled that second word. This of course has me wondering what it is about the name “Andy’s Weird Warped World” that can be mistaken for a black pornographic site.

Chuck Norris College – If I had the chance to go back to school. I would go here. And I don’t even care if I would fail Roundhouse Kicking 101.

Mystique Wheel Squeak – Doesn’t this person know that there’s nothing mysterious about squeaky wheels. They just need oil.

Squeal on Your Employer – Unless they are wasting company time reading my blog, then you should keep their secret.

Well, that's all I got for you now. See you around.

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