Friday, August 21, 2009

The Tear Jerk Journal - Conversations

So I walked into Lowe’s to see what kind of lumber would be available for when we finally do have the money to buy the lumber. And here is the conversation we had.

Lowe’s Employee: “Can I help you find something?”

Me: “Yes, I need to find some hardwood plywood.”

LE: “We have this wood here in stock.”

Me: “Hmm, these aren’t the thickness I need.”

LE: “Really, why not? These sizes are the generally accepted sizes. What exactly are you building? I can tell you if these will work for your project.”

Me: “I’m building a teardrop camper.”

LE: “You’re building a what?”

Me: “A teardrop camper. You know, those little campers from the 1940’s that have like that teardrop shape to them.”

LE: (With an un-sure look on his face) “Oh…OK.”

Me: …

LE: (Looking very skeptical) “So you’re building a camper…like what people take to a campground?”

Me: “Yea...a camper.”

LE: (looking at me like I am a total dumb ass) “I’ve never heard of anyone building their own camper before. Is that even possible?”

Me: “Well actually, lots of people build them.”

LE: “Is it like that e-mail picture of The Redneck Camper where it’s just an outhouse on a flat trailer.”

Me: (Not amused) “No you R-tard! It’s not an outhouse on a flat trailer.”

LE: (slightly offended, very confused) “You’re gonna build a camper?”

Me: (Embarrassed because it does sound silly the way he said it) “Why don’t I try Home Depot for what I need?”

So then I go down the street to Home Depot where I find an employee to ask about lumber.

Me: “Hello, I need to get some hardwood plywood for a project.”

Home Depot Employee: “Sure, what are you building?”

Me: (Calmly) “A large cabinet.”

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